Let’s talk about the James Clacher trial. If you’ve been anywhere near the news cycle lately, you’ve probably seen the headlines. A woman has accused a man of raping her on their first date. Now, the defense is claiming she gave him a lap dance that same night. The juxtaposition is jarring, to say the least.
First things first: consent is not a gray area. It’s specific, situational, and can be withdrawn at any moment. The idea that someone could engage in one act of intimacy and then be assaulted during another isn’t just plausible—it’s a reality survivors know all too well. Yet here we are, watching a legal strategy that seems straight out of the victim-blaming playbook. "She danced for him, so she must have wanted everything else." Sound familiar? It should. This line of reasoning has been used to undermine survivors for decades.
What’s especially troubling is how these narratives play out in the public sphere. Headlines like these don’t just report the news—they shape perceptions. When we focus on the "lap dance" rather than the allegation of rape, we inadvertently reinforce the myth that survivors must be "perfect" to be believed. That if there’s any ambiguity or complexity to their story, their credibility crumbles.
But real life isn’t black and white. Human behavior, especially in traumatic or high-pressure situations, is messy. It’s possible to be vulnerable, to send mixed signals, to act in ways that seem contradictory—and still be a victim of a horrific crime. A lap dance doesn’t negate the possibility of rape. Ever.
As this trial unfolds, it’s worth asking ourselves: Why are we so quick to dissect the survivor’s actions instead of the accused’s? Why does her behavior—what she wore, how she danced, whether she drank—become the focus, while his remains largely unscrutinized?
This case is a stark reminder that, despite progress, we still have a long way to go in how we treat survivors in and out of the courtroom. The court of public opinion often delivers its verdict long before the gavel falls, and the cost is measured in silenced voices and unchallenged predators.
So let’s be clear: No one asks to be raped. Not during a date, not after a dance, not ever. It’s time we stop entertaining defenses that suggest otherwise.
